Something, something, neighbour’s lawn, sprinkler, something.

I’ve seen YaST used at a distance and I think it’s up to the job of managing servers and headless systems but, seriously, it’s not even close to Group Policy. I not trying to sound dismissive of alternatives - I really do want a FOSS replacement - but it is hard to overstate how flexible and granular Group Policy is.

I feel like a stuck record saying this, but if there was a serious contender to Group Policy on Linux I honestly think Windows in the workplace would be dead in five years.

“Trade it in or recycle it” basically means “your best bet to solve this problem is to pass it on to someone else, who will pass it on to someone else, and so on until it arrives at landfill”.